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Don’t panic. Don’t act in anger. Vent about your own problems somewhere else, to get it out of your system. Avoid negative responses to the accusation. Recognize that it probably isn't about you. Let false accusations go. Forgive yourself for racist actions.
You might feel insulted, or start worrying about what others will think of you. Instead, focus on the immediate situation, your feelings about it, and potential solutions. If you begin worrying about all the potential ramifications of an accusation of racism, you’ll only drive yourself up a wall. If you need to, take a breather to calm down and free yourself of the anxiety you feel over being accused of racism. Step out to lunch or take a quick nap. It’s okay to be angry that you’re being labeled a racist. But do not speak or act in a way motivated by your frustration. This will only compound the problem. If you’re facing the accusation in a face-to-face encounter, take a deep breath before responding. Don’t shout or call names of the person who considers you a racist. If need be, excuse yourself to gather your thoughts and calm down before you say or do something that you’ll later regret. Say "I need some air" or "This is really important, and I'd like to take some time to think about it" if you need to leave. If you've been having a rough time, don't take it out on the person who called you out. Instead, vent via a social media account, or to a trusted friend.  Don't vent online about being called racist, as people may see this and feel that you're insensitive. However, feel free to have a rant about your own problems, from your broken car, an ableist remark directed at your wife, or how demanding your boss is. Your personal struggles don't present a "get out of jail free" card. It is possible to be having an awful day (or week, or month) and still do racist or hurtful things. You are still accountable for your actions. Do not flee from, freeze up when confronted by, or concede sarcastically to the individual who called you a racist.  For instance, if someone calls you a racist, do not say sardonically, “Yes, I am such a racist!” when in fact, you do not consider yourself one.  Alternately, though you may be totally blindsided by the charge that you’re a racist, do not stand there, stuttering and dumbstruck, or run out of the room, embarrassed. Gather your thoughts and think of what to say to the accuser.  Never attack back or cry "reverse racism." This will make the situation worse, not better. Running away from the person who thinks you’re racist will not make the problem go away. Taking it personally can make things worse. It's possible to do a racist thing, or hurt someone, while still being a kind and wonderful person. It just means you made a mistake. Don’t make it about you. You might be upset, but you should not cry, yell, or counter-accuse anyone of racism, or anything else.  These responses are immature and counterproductive. If they misunderstood what you were saying or received bad information, people make mistakes. If the accuser apologizes, let their accusation go.  Recognize that the person made an honest mistake and let it go at that.  Put yourself in their shoes and think about how you’d feel if the situation they thought had occurred actually had.  What would you feel or say?  For instance, if you thought, as your accuser may have, that someone had said that Asians are the only intelligent race, you may well have accused the person who uttered this racist statement to be a racist.  If the person who accused you thought you’d said something similar, you can understand why they did what they did.  Use this empathy to respond with forgiveness and move beyond the issue. Even if the other person doesn’t apologize, forgive them in your heart.  You don’t need to let them know in person that you have forgiven them for what they said.  Holding onto the frustration and embarrassment they caused you will only hurt you in the long run. Everyone hurts other people sometimes, and feeling remorse is a sign that you are still a good person at heart. You can accidentally do a racist thing without being a terrible racist. Your mistake is less important than how you made up for it. Don't hold on to regret forever, and allow yourself to move on.