INPUT ARTICLE: Article: While you and your partner are trying to work things out at home, you can also work things out in a safe environment where couples can speak freely about their relationship.  The therapist can encourage both parties to evaluate strengths and weaknesses of the relationship. If patterns emerge, such as patterns of infidelity or emotional abuse, the therapist can address them. If you feel you’re to blame for the affair, the therapist can help you to work through those problems. You may have feelings of inadequacy, or betrayal or anger and the therapist can help you  to deal with them. The partner who had the affair may need to work through feeling of regret, or may even need to know why they felt it necessary to have an affair. Here,too, the therapist can help. The partner who cheated may need to work on communicating dissatisfaction with the relationship so that the temptation of infidelity (or an excuse for it) can be avoided. Be specific. The more specific you are, the more tangible will be the changes that you both make to help your relationship go forward.  Do you need certain times each week, an hour or so, in which you discuss problems that have cropped up between you? Do you need more physical attention, more affection? Do you need more romance? Do you need something simple, like going to bed at the same time each night? Keep in mind that you’re “resetting the clock.” This is a chance to start over, using your prior experiences to inform the way you define and maintain your relationship. Why did your partner think your relationship wasn’t working?  This will probably be difficult since your partner was the one who had the affair.  You may not be feeling in an especially generous and giving mood. Remind yourself that you’re addressing an underlying problem by finding out just what your partner thinks can be improved. You're working to avoid another affair. As time passes, the discussions about the details of the affair will become less frequent. They should.  You don’t want the affair to be what your relationship is about. When you find it's no longer urgent for you to talk about the affair, set aside specific times for discussing it so that the affair won’t overwhelm the relationship. Enjoy each other’s company by revisiting the types of things that you used to do together that you enjoyed.  Put fun and friendship back into your relationship by revisiting activities that once made you feel close. Add new activities so that your relationship will feel authentic and not contrived. Movies, long drives, nature walks, dinner out, visiting friends . . . what were the things you did together that made you feel closer? Make a date night once a week a regular routine. Talk about the present rather than the past when you’re on your date, so that you can go forward and reinvigorate your relationship.  Don’t let the affair define your relationship.  You'll always be aware that your partner was unfaithful to you.  But lack of trust can't be the basis for a healthy rebuilt relationship. Most affairs are preceded by problems with communicating. Misunderstandings occur and feelings get hurt. Avoid these problems by communicating routinely.  Share your daily experiences. It’s not necessary to give a blow-by-blow account.  But keep in touch with each other’s lives and thoughts by communicating. Listen to your partner.  Show you care about their experiences, thoughts, feelings. It takes time. There are stages you’ll go through, from the initial crisis, to a loss of belief in your relationship, to slowly coming to trust your partner again.  It could take six months to rebuild trust in the relationship.  It could take two years. It's up to you to decide how much time and effort to put in. Think about the time spent as an investment in a relationship that will, hopefully, last many many years.

SUMMARY: Consider getting professional help. Tell your partner what your needs are. Ask your partner how you can make the relationship better. Restore your relationship by working together. Communicate consistently with your partner. Be patient with the rebuilding process.


INPUT ARTICLE: Article: When you arrive to the elevator, decide which way you are going and be ready to wait. An elevator's arrival time can be affected by many factors such as elevators' traffic, the amount of floors, rush hours, and available elevators due to unforeseen maintenance or closures. Stand clear of the door. This etiquette is practiced in a lot of public situations such as subways or buses, and elevators are no different. Also, keep in mind elevators serve individuals who suffer handicaps or people handling large loads of cargo or furniture. Take a step aside and allow passengers enough space to make their way out of the elevator. Take a second to ensure that the elevator car stops at your floor. Most elevators have signals to show if they are going down or up. In the case where you cannot find any signal, ask the passengers on the elevator which way they are headed. Avoiding going in the wrong the direction, especially if the building has a lot of floors. When the elevator stops at your floor, it might not mean people will exit. If the doors open and passengers do not get out, assess what space remains. If you cannot see enough room for you, let the doors close and wait for another elevator. Elevators vary in size and available space. Locate a section where you will feel both comfort for the ride and convenience for your exit. The back of the elevator is the ideal location two-fold:  it leaves room for other passengers to enter or exit, and it secures a good spot for longer rides. Elevators have buttons on either sides of the door. The majority of the floor buttons are numbered; basement, garage, street level, lobby, etc. may be represented by letters.  If someone is standing closer to the buttons than you, they might offer to select for you. If they do not, kindly ask them to select the floor. In some elevators, double-tapping on a lighted button allows you to cancel a floor call

SUMMARY:
Press the "up" or "down" button. Allow any people to leave before entering. Make certain the elevator is going in your direction. Decide if the elevator has enough space. Enter and find an empty spot in the elevator. Select your floor.