Summarize the following:
Most people are taught how to acquire things, but very few people are taught how to lose something. Grief is a complex emotion that manifests in different ways. There's no one "right" or "wrong" way to mourn a significant loss, such as the loss of a relationship.  Grief is an individual journey. Everyone experiences it differently. Don’t rush yourself and don’t allow others to rush you through your grief. You may find it helpful to give yourself a "time limit" to grieve. This should not be intended to make you feel guilty about your emotions, but to help you recognize that there is life beyond this loss, and that you'll be okay. There are basic needs that most people have, including the need to love; the need to be loved; and the need to belong. Your ex-boyfriend fulfilled some of your needs, but he is not and will not be the only one with whom you find fulfillment.  Did he make you feel pretty? Did he help you feel not so alone in the world? Did he make you laugh? Find an alternative way to meet your needs. Introspection is the process of directly attempting to access your own internal processes. Figure out how and why you react to the people and things around you, and you will be able to help yourself solve many personal struggles. Only you can do the work to answers to these questions. There are some who believe that people come into your life to teach you something. Each experience prepares us to be smarter and more in tune with what we want out of life.  Sit down and make a list of the things you learned from your ex-boyfriend. Write about the positive things that happened too. It is easy to only see the negative when you are in the midst of all the pain; but no relationship is all bad. There is a purpose to the ceremonies we follow when something ends. Graduations, funerals, closing ceremonies – they all provide an end point. They allow us to get closure, emotional resolve, for something we’ve been through. Creating a good-bye ceremony will help complete your relationship with the pain.  Write a letter to the person, but do not send it. Include all the significant emotional experiences you shared. Thank him for the good times, and the bad. Express the anger. Tell him, "I no longer need the pain that I am feeling so I am giving it back to you. Good-bye."  Read the letter out loud to yourself or to a trusted friend or family member, then burn the letter in a safe place. Fire is a form of cleansing and can allow the energy of your turmoil to change.  If you decide to allow him back into your life, the emotional work you do will always be worth it. You can use these skills for the rest of your life. It’s important to keep things in perspective. No one likes to feel small or diminished or ignored by an ex-boyfriend, or by anyone for that matter. Once you see there is life after a break-up or separation, you will be able to release your feelings of upset and shepherd in feelings of relief. You can let it go and re-frame your priorities.  If you try to let something go and it continues to eat at you, then you likely need to process more feelings. This may include talking with a trusted friend or family member, writing, or going for a hike to physically work out your emotions. It can be upsetting if someone tells you to “just let it go” if you haven’t reached a level of resolve about the matter. Take a deep breath and say, “I’m working on letting it go, but I’m not there yet.” Once you settle into a feeling of balanced perspective, you will see that some things are worth getting upset about, and some are not.
Work the process. Determine the emotional need he fulfilled. Appreciate the positive qualities and learning experiences. Say goodbye. Gain perspective.