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Make sure that your child knows that you are willing to listen if he or she wants to talk. Your child may want to talk right away, in a few days, or not at all. If your child decides that he or she wants to talk, give your full attention.  Allow your child to express his or her feelings while you listen. Offer a shoulder to cry on if your child begins to cry. Reassure your child that these emotions are difficult now, but they will get better over time. After you have finished talking, give your child a hug. Your child may express feelings of guilt or worry about the death of a pet. Some children may feel like they caused the death or like they did not treat the pet well enough while the pet was alive or that the pet could have been saved. Make sure that you reassure your child about any source of guilt that he or she may have. For example, if your child is worried that more could have been done to save the life of the pet, reassure your child that the veterinarian did all that he or she could to save the pet’s life. Your child will most likely have lots of questions about the death of a pet, especially if this is your child’s first experience with death. Do your best to answer these questions, but keep in mind that it is okay to say “I don’t know.”   For example, if your child asks questions the afterlife of animals, you may want to use the teachings of your spiritual background to help inform your answer, or you may choose to leave this more open ended and say, “I'm not sure.” You can explain what some people believe, and if you're undecided about what happens, you can tell this to your child. Then you can share with your child a picture of what you hope the pet is experiencing right now, such as having all the doggie bones he can eat without getting a bellyache, and miles of soft grass and sunshine. Some questions you should answer in a definite, clear way. For example, if your child asks whether or not the pet suffered when he died, then you should be honest, but aim to comfort your child. You might say something like, “Fido was in pain when he went to see the veterinarian, but the veterinarian gave him some medicine to help the pain go away before he died.” It might be tempting to allow your child to miss soccer practice or to skip a friend’s birthday party because he or she is feeling sad, but it is better to keep your child active and involved. If your child starts to pull away from activities and friends, this may be harmful to your child in the long run. Keep in mind that it is okay to cry in front of your child, but avoid letting your emotions get out of control. For example, do not sob in front of your child. This may frighten or overwhelm your child. Make sure that you excuse yourself if you begin to become overwhelmed by your emotions. In some situations, children may have a hard time letting go of a much-loved pet. In these situations, counseling may be the best option. You can talk to your child’s school counselor to arrange a meeting or look into a therapist who works with children. Some things that indicate that your child may be struggling with grief include:  Constant sadness. Ongoing sadness (more than a month). Difficulty in school. Trouble sleeping or other physical symptoms that started after the death of your pet.
Listen to your child when he or she wants to talk. Reassure your child. Answer your child’s questions as well as you can. Encourage your child to maintain his or her normal routine. Control your emotions around your child. Watch for signs that your child may be struggling with grief.