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Don’t feel guilty about breaking up. Don’t contact your ex for a few months after you break up. Take care of yourself and let yourself heal.
Breaking off a relationship when it’s not working isn’t something you should feel guilty about—in fact, it’s a form of self-care. You’re also showing the other person compassion. Odds are, they’re aware of the same issues that you are but they just can’t bring themselves to do it. Give your ex at least a few months to process the breakup before reaching out. This means getting them off of your mind by cutting off communication through social media, texting, calling, or face-to-face interactions. Time apart from each other is necessary and, in the long run, beneficial for both you and your ex.  This may also mean deleting their number from your phone, unfollowing and unfriending them, and deleting photos of the two of you. If you’re worried about seeming cruel or cold, let the person know that this is something you’ll need following the breakup. Even if you’re the one initiating the breakup, it’ll probably be painful for you, too. Remember to give yourself time to grieve and adjust to the change. Focus on self-care activities and doing things that you enjoy, such as spending time with friends and family, being in nature, exercising, taking bubble baths, and reading. Don't turn to alcohol or drugs to make yourself feel better. In the end, these things can actually make the healing process more difficult.