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Couple’s counseling can be incredibly helpful after a partner has been unfaithful. Find a counselor that specializes in helping couples cope with infidelity. You and your partner should meet with them regularly to work on healing your relationship and moving forward.  Your partner should be involved in the decision to go to couple’s counseling. Let them know that you would like to seek professional help mending your relationship, and make them an equal and active partner in deciding which counselor is right for you. Set up a therapy schedule that works for both of you. Since you are attending as a couple, you will need to find time once a week or once every other week where you can go in together. Be considerate of your partner’s schedule when you make appointments. Let the counselor know directly that you are there to work past infidelity. Understand that recovery will take time, but let your therapist know you are looking for long-term solutions. Open and honest communication will be essential to helping rebuild trust between you and your partner. Stay in touch with your partner, and be honest about your feelings and your daily activities.  If your partner lets you know that they want more communication about where you are and what you are doing, be understanding and work out a plan to check in with them. Communicate honestly with your partner about your everyday thoughts and feelings. Allow yourself to be emotional and express struggle or regret if that is what you are feeling. Equally as important, allow your partner the chance to communicate. Engage them in conversation, make an effort to not only listen but truly internalize and work to understand what they are saying. Actively listen by repeating back what you hear them say. You and your partner will likely fight as you try to move forward. It is important that you try to work past confrontation, though, rather than fighting to win. Try not to bring up old arguments or unrelated subjects, as this will likely only upset your partner further.  Try to fight fair with your partner. Focus on the issue at hand and avoid bringing in other issues. Keep your calm, and discuss specific instances and your emotional responses, rather than making broad generalizations about your relationship.  Come to a concrete resolution. Don’t assume that a fight is resolved simply because you or your partner starts to run out of energy. Even if the two of you aren’t on the same page, it is important to come to a real resolution that you both agree to so that you can move forward.
Start therapy. Open lines of communication. Work past confrontation.