Summarize the following:
Although you may think that checking up on your ex on social media is stalking, it is actually a completely normal behavior following a breakup. You may want to see who your ex is with and what the person is doing in the hopes that your ex feels as miserable as you. But this can create a bad cycle of using social media for reassurance that ultimately makes you feel worse. Be aware that if you are using social media to find out where your ex is and then find him or her, this is actual stalking and potentially illegal. If you find yourself doing this, you may need to seek professional treatment. The expansive world of social media sites like Facebook, Snapchat, Twitter, and Instagram give people incredible access to the lives of others—including those you may not want to see. Blocking your ex entirely from any of your own social media sites may most extreme way to not stalk your ex, but it is also the most effective.  Be prepared to deal with either your ex or mutual friends asking you why you took this action. Your decision may hurt your ex or mutual friends even. However, explain that the pain of your breakup is too much and this was the best decision for you and not meant to hurt anyone. Realize that another added benefit of blocking someone is that you often need to refriend or refollow the person. The sheer embarrassment of having to ask permission to see so that you can stalk the person may keep you from doing this. A less extreme way to not have the temptation of stalking your ex is to unfriend or unfollow the person on social media. This can help prevent you from accessing your ex’s sites, limit how much of the person’s life you see, and also minimize how badly you feel. Prepare yourself to deal with invariable questions just as you may with blocking an ex. You can also use the same explanation, “Honestly, I need a break. Maybe in the future I can follow my ex on social media. For now, I need to just not see or be able to see what Gregory is doing.” If you’re concerned that blocking your ex might hurt the person or leave others questioning you, limit what you see on social media. You could simply unsubscribe from your ex’s posts or other features that might alert you to what your ex is doing. Some social media sites like Facebook will even automatically prompt you to limit exposure when you change your relationship status. Depending on your network of friends, your ex may appear in statuses, location updates, and photos on social media sites. These may upset you, especially if you find out your ex is with a new partner or having a ball without you. In order to avoid seeing your ex's name or image, consider un-following the social media feeds of mutual and/ or close friends.  Play off anything you may miss if you don’t want the person to know you’re no longer following his or her feeds. If a feed is mentioned, just say “oh, I must have missed that” or “I only got a quick glance because I didn’t notice it until I was at work.” Consider being honest to mutual friends. You can say, “I’m so sorry, but it’s just too painful to see Gregory in your news feeds. I really value your friendship and know he does, too. For now, I’d love to catch up with what you’re doing in other ways.” From time to time, you may be tempted to poke around social media and search engines for your ex. One innocent search or view of a news feed could lead you to a night of questioning about things such as whether or not the person who liked your ex’s recent profile picture is a relative or new love interest. By reminding yourself that it’s better for you to avoid your ex’s social media and web presence altogether, you aid the process of closure. A little self-control in this regard can give you more control over yourself and your emotions. Many smartphones, tablets, and other devices connect phone numbers with social media presences. You can prevent yourself from stalking your ex by removing the person’s contact information from devices. This can not only keep you from looking up your ex in a moment of weakness, but will also remove an ever-present reminder of the person. Write your ex’s contact information on a piece of paper if you may need to contact the person. This keeps you from having the reminder of the person as well as the temptation of looking up his or her sites.that you won’t see every day and store it in a safe place.
Recognize that your stalking is normal—but painful. Block your ex from all social media sites. Unfriend or stop following your ex. Limit your ex’s presence on your news feed. Stop following the feeds of mutual friends. Practice self-control. Remove contact information from your devices.