There are two schools of thought on the matter: arriving early and arriving late (talk about rocket science). Let's go over both and you can pick which tactic seems more fitting for you:  Arriving early. You can get a chance to talk to people before groups have coalesced, leaving more openings for you. There are also fewer people, which isn't as intimidating. When more people do come, you can walk up to the people you've introduced yourself to. Arriving late. Everyone's already there, meaning there are also conversations you can just jump into, taking the pressure off of you. You can often blend into a conversation easily and unnoticed. And you can pick whichever one looks the most interesting! You can say or ask questions like: Hey! What's up? or What are you guys talking about? Even the biggest of extroverts sometimes have problems initiating. It's just plain scary -- we're all afraid of getting rejected. So sometimes you'll have to bite the bullet. And you know what you'll find? That most people are at the very least polite. You may not get a red carpet rolled out for you, but it definitely won't be as bad as what's brewing in your head. How to initiate? Well, for starters eye contact, smiling and body language (which we'll get to next). Then it's just a matter of making a situational comment and jumping off the platform from there. What's a situational comment? Glad you asked. This is the kind of comment where you know you two both have it in common. The bus is late, your boss is wearing a dreadful tie, or that chip dip is downright transcendent. It only takes one little sentence to get a conversation brewing. When they give you a response, you simply smile back, tell them your name and ask theirs. Conversation? Initiated. Here's an example of two people in line for coffee:  Jim: "I cannot believe they've upped the prices again -- better be liquid gold in my latte!"Karen: "Ugh, I know. I keep on telling myself I'll stop and I never do."Jim: "Ha, same here. I'm Jim by the way."Karen: "I'm Karen. What's your drink of choice, Jim?" Take this in two ways: small comments and small situations. Here's what that means:  Start out with small comments -- in other words, don't wait to make profound, earth-shattering statements to bust into the party with. If you do, you'll be that silent guy that busts into the conversation, taking it to the next level the party was not ready for. Instead, get your foot in the door with an "I agree," "totally," or even an "I'm not so sure about that." As with anything, ease into it. Start out with small situations -- like in line at the cafe. If socializing stresses you out, it's best to do it in places where it will end almost immediately. Think of little opportunities that you could take -- talking to your cashier at the supermarket, people you see on the street or at the bus stop, or whoever you're next to in any line. 5 minutes and it'll all be over with, which is way less scary than an entire night. Because if you don't, you'll bore yourself with your own stories. The reason other people have interesting things to talk about is because they open up about their lives and the things they do. It doesn't have to be anything monumental, either. Things as simple as cooking, working out, and reading can spark fascinating conversations. Also don't be afraid to show your personality when in a conversation. If you are silly, show your silly side. Your actions shows the other person how you really feel about a certain situation.  When someone says, "What did you do today?" you probably want to respond with something other than, "Sat at home." That's fine if you did, but you did so much more than that. When you were surfing the net, did you read anything interesting? Did you cook a meal? Did you see anything remarkable? How can you turn this simple question around? You really don't even have to answer it, per se. You could easily respond with, "Oh, man, today was the start of the Olympics! Do you follow it at all?" Boom -- conversation started with no spotlight on you. The other person won't even notice. A large part of making conversation with strangers, acquaintances, even good friends is about staying current with news and trends. These are topics that all parties have at least heard of, so it makes for easier conversation. So take 10 minutes out of your day to read the biggest news stories. Catch a little bit of John Stewart, Tosh.O, the Bachelor, go see the latest hyped-up film, read what's topping the New York Times' Bestseller list, or whatever would get you talking in your social circle. You don't even have to have well thought-out opinions. People, in general, love being asked questions and talking, so let them do it. When you find out even the littlest bit about them, find an opinion. They like working out? What did they think about that Biggest Loser contestant being so thin? They like pop music? Surely they have an opinion on Miley Cyrus. If you do, you'll never put any effort into your social interactions. You'll shut down before they even get started, never giving them a chance. And the truth of the matter is that no one is just like they seem. You could label people by the clothes that they wear or a comment they make, but you'll be wrong about some part of them. Instead, give them a chance to surprise you. You'll learn something in no time. The more people you meet, initiate with, and get to know, the more fruitful your entire life will be. You'll have more experiences, learn more things, and be more experienced in the world. People are here to make it richer; the more people you invite in, the better off you'll be. All this talk will be rendered null and void if you don't use it. You gotta make opportunities to be social. If you don't have parties to crash, sign up for a club. Take an academic class or a class at your gym. Work in cafes. Just get around people. It's the only way to start. You never know what will lead to bigger and better things. So when you first join that softball league, you'll be making chitchat with your teammates. But eventually you'll be going to team parties and using your social skills on a larger platform. So take these small chances now -- you'll be a social butterfly in time.

Summary: Time your arrival. Initiate. Make situational comments. Start out small. Do stuff. Stay current. Don't judge people. Put yourself out there.


Unlike the Continental method, the American style of using a fork adopts more of a pen-like hold. The handle rests against your hand in between your thumb and forefinger, your middle finger and thumb are holding the base, and your index finger rests on top. Again, the tines are downward, curving away from you. This hand positioning is the same as in the aforementioned style -- with your index finger along the base and your other fingers wrapped around it. If you are eating a dish that doesn't require cutting, keep your fork in your right hand at all times with this method. Tines can face downward if you're taking a bite, but will generally return upward for the majority of the time. However, do know that only in the absolute most formal of settings will this ever be an issue. We're talking when the President is sitting across from you. Other than that, don't stress. Your silverware should never touch the table. If you're only using your fork, be sure your knife is resting along the edge of your plate. When you put your fork down, rest the handle on the edge, tines near the center of the plate.
Summary: When cutting, hold the fork in your left hand. Only when cutting, place the knife in your right hand. Apart from cutting, eat with your fork in your right hand, tines facing upward.