INPUT ARTICLE: Article: Lending money to friends can really put a friendship at risk. If your friend takes too long in paying the money back, you may hesitate to ask for it and the person might start believing the loan was a gift. If you do not think your friendship (or pocketbook) can withstand an unpaid loan, break the news as gently as possible to your friend. Remember to be as honest as you can. For example, you could say to your friend, "I know you are in a tight spot financially. I really value our friendship, but friends and loans just do not get along. Is there some other way I can help out?” Or, “I just don’t have the extra cash myself to lend. If I could give you the money, I would.” If you know you won't be supporting a donation request, express the importance of the request, turn it down, and give an alternative, if you can. For example, "It sounds like you're working on a great cause, but I just can't work it in right now. I've already pledged my monthly donation funds. You might try x business or ask me again next month." Don't feel obligated to donate to every request. Chances are, you're focusing on your time, business, or finances. Say yes to projects that you really can or want to commit to. Most kids don't like just being told not to do something. If your child wants something that you're not going to give or allow, firmly say no and explain why you're not allowing it. Make sure to express their point of view and then suggest something that they can have or can do. For example, you might say, "No, you can't spend the night at your friend's house during the school week. I don't want you to be too tired for class the next day. I know you're frustrated, but you can always spend the night over the weekend." Never feel obligated when someone asks you for a huge favor. After all, the person probably has no idea what your work or stress load is currently like. You have the choice to say no, even to a personal favor. If the person is a good enough friend, she should understand and not press you. For example, you might say, "I really wish I could babysit for you this week, but I've got a really big work deadline and a family obligation." Be clear and honest. Don't lie, which could hurt your relationship in the long run. Be direct and clear to make sure the other person gets the message. In romantic situations, people tend to take any ambiguity as a sign of hope, which isn't fair or pleasant for anyone involved. Polite ways to be blunt include "You're (a good friend / a nice guy), but I'm not interested in you that way," or, "We're not quite a match."  If you just went on the date and have been asked to go on another one, you should be as honest, but gentle as you can. Try saying something like, "I enjoyed this evening, but I don't think you and I are a good fit." Cut the conversation short once you've turned someone down. Most likely, neither of you will be happy trying to spend time together immediately afterward. If a romantic partner is pressuring you to start having sex, or act more intimate than you are comfortable with, firmly decline with a straightforward "No." If necessary, mention a reason, such as the chance of pregnancy, your moral beliefs, or simply that you will make the decision on your own schedule. Let the other person know that this is your personal decision, and has nothing to do with his or her attractiveness. Don't assume that your partner will pick up on your lack of enthusiasm and simply stop. You need to be clear. If you're being repeatedly hounded to go on a date or start having sex, it's time to be extra firm. If someone doesn't listen to your polite responses, another firm "No" is necessary. Here are some examples of followup responses to try:  Say, "I'm uncomfortable with your constant asking, so I'm going to have to say no." Tell your friend or partner that the behavior is making you sad or upset. Turn down requests to spend time together. Don't get invested in the opinion of a stranger or acquaintance. If you can, stop seeing the person completely. First, thank him or her, and say that you're honored to be asked by such a wonderful person. Say you're not going to accept, but it's not because of anything he or she did. Finally, offer a full explanation of why you are turning down the proposal, including all the specifics in your situation.  This advice applies to someone in a serious relationship with you. If someone you only started dating proposes, gently say "That's sweet, but it's way too early." If someone proposes to you in public, prevent embarrassment by keeping the moment short and sweet. Try "I love you, and I want to talk about it in private." Don't create a big scene or dramatic refusal.

SUMMARY: Refuse to lend someone money. Refuse to donate. Tell your kids no. Turn down a big favor. Turn down a date. Turn down sex. Handle persistent requests. Turn down a marriage proposal.


INPUT ARTICLE: Article: When bad things happen to you, try to remember that things could be worse. This is not to diminish the pain of the things going on in your life: no, those things still suck. There’s no changing that. But when you understand that things could be worse, you’ll find it much easier to appreciate the things that you do have. So, knowing that you could lose so much more but that you haven’t, take the time to appreciate the things in your life that make you happy. Hug your mom, tell your best friend how much they mean to you, and watch a sunset...because right now, in this moment, you’re alive and that (in itself) is amazing and wonderful. If it feels like you don’t have things in your life to appreciate or being happy about, then you need to go out and get some things to be happy about. Start volunteering, make a new friend, or do something you’ve always wanted to do. Our lives are short and we shouldn’t spend them being bored and unhappy. Things will go wrong. It happens. It happens a lot, actually. But if you believe and understand that things go wrong, then you will know that things going wrong doesn’t make the world end. Our problems will sometimes seem big, and they often are incredibly painful and difficult to handle, but (as the proverb goes) this too shall pass. You will have other problems and you will have other happiness. You can’t change the past, you can’t undo something that’s gone wrong. All you can do is pick yourself up and move on. Take a new approach and fix the problem if you can. If you can’t, just go on to the next thing. Giving yourself a new goal, a new purpose, and new successes will help you not care about the failures you have experienced.

SUMMARY:
Realize that things could be worse. Appreciate the good things in your life. Believe that it is not the end of the world. Move on to the next thing.