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If your fear of marriage causes you stress, find a way to unwind. This may help you come to terms with it. When you find yourself worrying about marriage, try some methods for dealing with anxieties that apply in other parts of life.  Try yoga or meditation. These exercises are designed to help you stop dwelling on your anxieties. Drink less coffee and alcohol. These are drugs that can affect your mood as well as your brain chemistry. If you are feeling high-strung because of marriage anxiety, decrease your consumption of coffee and alcohol. Get enough sleep and exercise. These are essential to your physical and emotional health, and help you reduce your fears and anxieties. The act of putting your anxieties down on paper forces you to pinpoint what it is that scares you about marriage. It is also therapeutic. As you write about your fears, try to come up with solutions to them. Write about why you want to get married, and how your partner can help you achieve your goals. Write down the stable, unchanging qualities you see in your partner. Think about struggles and conflicts you have faced in the past and how you overcame them. Don't let your anxiety or fear make you forget how amazing your partner is and all the reasons you want to be with him or her.

summary: Practice relaxation techniques. Journal your thoughts. Remind yourself about who your partner is.


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Some companies have sabbatical programs for their employees, which will determine how much time you can take off and whether you will receive pay. If your company does not have an official sabbatical policy, it will be up to you to make a case to your boss — or quit your job, if it's time for a life change. If your company does not have an official policy, your best bet is to plan for a sabbatical that lasts six to twelve weeks. If you've been working for the company for fewer than four years, an even shorter mini-sabbatical may be more reasonable. Purchase a three-ring binder with clear inserts so you can organize your sabbatical in an organized and thought-out fashion. This will keep you on track and make the trip real. You will put everything about this trip in the binder, including thoughts, lists, photos, photocopies from books, print outs from websites, and notes. Write down all your goals on a personal list. Keep these goals in mind while you plan the sabbatical. Here are a few examples of what you might be looking for:  Seeing new places Relaxing, and improving physical and mental health Doing humanitarian work Considering a different career Learning new skills This is the fun part of planning. Look at your goals and decide how you would most enjoy accomplishing them. If you have any lifelong dreams, this could be the time to accomplish them. If you're having trouble coming up with ideas, try answering these questions:  Where would you love to go on vacation? Is there anything you've always wanted to do? Have you ever considered alternate careers? Or are you aiming for a promotion or "sideways" movement to a related area? Could you learn the necessary skills if you had the spare time? Are there any hobbies you've been interested in, but never had the time for? Are there hobbies your friends have that seem fun? This is the boring part of the plan, but necessary. Now that you have an idea of some of the things you might get up to, it's time to estimate the cost. Determine how much money you can spend per month during your sabbatical, and begin to research any costs associated with your tentative plans.  Ideally, save 10–20% of your available budget for unexpected expenses, especially if you are quitting your job to take the sabbatical. Start saving money for your sabbatical early. Set aside a portion of each paycheck, try to pay off debt, and stop using credit cards while you're saving. If you are planning a long trip abroad, look for more advice in the section on logistics. It's often a good idea to wait until planning is well underway before you begin this conversation. Some of the people in your life may be more risk-averse than you, or may not support the idea of a vacation. Bring it up after you have an estimate of how much the sabbatical would cost, and what you would like to do. With a more concrete understanding of the situation, you can respond to their concerns reasonably and logically. Of course, many family members and friends may fully support you already. Your sabbatical can be beneficial to your employer as well, especially if you need a break to regain your enthusiasm and motivation. Give him additional reasons as well, for instance:  If you are traveling abroad, consider whether your new language skills and cultural connection could be beneficial to your employer, or whether there are contacts abroad that your company does business with. You might learn new, work-relevant skills through classes, personal projects, or visiting other organizations. Offer to train coworkers or interns to cover any vital work that needs to be done in your absence.

summary: Find out your company's policies. Create a sabbatical binder. List the reasons you want to take a sabbatical. Brainstorm what you'd like to do. Do the financial planning. Talk to your family and friends. Pitch the idea to your boss.


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Before you head out, search for videos of club dance moves. Some of these videos just feature people dancing to club music, others take you through tutorials of how to master the moves. Watching these videos can help give you a mental picture of the moves that you can imitate. If you're extremely worried about what you look like, tape yourself dancing to club music to make sure your moves look okay. Fix anything you find strange about your movements. Compare it to videos you see online. Look for things like not enough movement, being too stiff, arms being too rigid, and awkward head movements. Get dressed up and go to the club with a group of friends. This can help you feel relaxed and less self-conscious, which will help you perform the dance moves much more confidently. One of the worst things you can do at a club is overthink your moves. Overthinking makes you rigid and awkward. Be careful not to do spastic moves where you are flailing all over the dance floor either. When you first get to the club, scope out the other people on the dance floor. See how they are dancing, what they look like, what kind of moves they are doing. More than likely, they will be doing some of the same basic dance moves you will be. Don't stress and have fun. Relaxing also helps you stay loose. If you're feeling tense, just start moving around to warm up and loosen your muscles. Roll your shoulders, stretch your neck from side to side, sway as you bounce a bit. This helps you get the key body parts moving so you can dance more fluidly.
summary: Watch videos of club dance moves. Tape yourself dancing. Go with a group of friends. Relax.