Problem: Article: The first thing that you need to do in order to move past your partner’s emotional affair is to acknowledge how you feel. You may be experiencing a range of emotions, such as anger, fear, and sadness. Give yourself permission to feel these emotions and deal with them one by one.  Writing about your feelings may help. Try taking 15 to 20 minutes per day to check in with your emotions and write about them. You may also feel the need to express your emotions in other ways, such as screaming to express anger or crying to express sadness. Allow yourself to express your emotions in appropriate ways. For example, you might scream in your car while driving on the freeway alone or have a good cry when you are at home. You may find yourself dwelling on what your partner did to you, but this will not help you to move on. You have a right to feel the way that you do, but dwelling on your partner’s betrayal will only hurt you. Instead, try to distract yourself with engaging activities, such as:   Meditation. Meditation is an excellent stress relief strategy. It can help you to dispel unwanted thoughts and focus on the present instead. Try taking a meditation class to help you develop this skill.  Getting more exercise. Exercising is necessary for good health. It can also help to relieve stress and distract you from worries about your affair. Try to get at least 30 minutes of cardiovascular exercise every day. For example, you might include 30 minutes of walking, running, biking, dancing, or swimming into your daily schedule.  Making plans with your friends. Getting together with a friend can help you to relax and forget about your problems for a while. Go to see a movie, have dinner, or grab a cup of coffee.  Picking up a new hobby. For example you might try weight lifting, knitting, or cake decorating. Choose something that is fun and engaging for you. You may have an ideal vision of your relationship with your partner, or at least a vision of how it could be better than it is now. Think about this vision and try to identify what needs to happen in order to get there. What needs to change? What specific things do you or your partner will need to do differently? For example, if you want your relationship to be more honest and open, then you and your partner might agree to only tell each other the truth, even about little things. Or, if you want your relationship to be more spontaneous, then you and your partner might agree to surprise each other once every week, such as with a small gift or a surprise date. Before you can forgive your partner, you need to forgive yourself for any resentment you are feeling towards yourself. If you have identified something specific that you think may have caused your partner to have an emotional affair, then use that as part of your statement of forgiveness.  For example, if you think that taking on extra hours at work may have played a role in your partner’s emotional affair, then forgive yourself for putting work before your relationship. You might say something like, “I am human and I made a mistake. I put my career ahead of my marriage and my partner turned to someone else for companionship. I am upset that it happened, but I am willing to forgive myself and move on.” Although it is possible for a relationship to recover from infidelity, there are situations where this is not possible. Sometimes affairs continue or there is simply no trust left in the relationship.  If you cannot seem to get past your partner’s affair or if the affair is still going on, then it may be time for you to move on. Keep in mind that recovering from an affair takes time and persistence. If you and your partner are both willing to work on the relationship, then it may be even stronger in the end.
Summary: Allow yourself to feel your emotions. Try to focus on other things. Think about how you want your relationship to be. Forgive yourself. Know your limits.

Problem: Article: . Turn off your television and your cell phone, and eliminate other external distractions. Use a space in which you feel comfortable and free from the need to complete tasks and other stressors. Set aside designated time to meditate, preferably between twenty minutes and a couple hours, depending on your abilities and preferences.  Wear comfortable clothes that are suitable for your space’s temperature. You’ll want to avoid being distracted by stiff clothing or by being too hot or too cold. Don’t allow birds chirping, cars driving by, and other unavoidable external sounds to interrupt your meditation. Being aware of the world and its interconnections can actually be beneficial to meditation. However, if you live in a location, such as by a subway stop or train track, where noise is dominating your thoughts, you should consider putting on music or a mantra recording, both of which are available on Youtube and other services. To eliminate stiffness and tension in your body as you sit still to meditate, you should stretch yourself out before beginning. Take a few minutes before meditating to stretch your legs, hips, back, shoulders, and neck.  While sitting, hold your legs out straight in front of you and reach for your toes to stretch your calves and hamstrings. Bend your knees while seated and bring the soles of your feet together to stretch your hips and quadriceps. Typically, one sits in a seated, cross-legged position when they meditate. Do so only if it’s comfortable for you to sit cross-legged for an extended period of time, and hold your back upright, unbowed but not unnaturally straight. However, consider sitting in a chair or with your back braced by a wall or other object if you are unable to sit cross-legged without discomfort.  Remember it's important to wear comfortable clothes that allow you to sit still for a while. You will want to avoid distractions from tension or stiffness in your body. Especially if you are just beginning to practice meditation, it is most important to find a distraction-free, comfortable body position. Sit on a yoga mat, a cushion, or on folded blankets or towels for more comfort. Begin your meditation with controlled breathing techniques. Be conscious of your breathing and use each breath you take to focus your intention. Breathe in slowly as you count to four, hold for four, and exhale for four. Let your awareness on your breath help you clear your mind and focus your concentration.  As you inhale, consider light flowing through your essence, as life rises through your vertebrae and fills you.  Imagine the energy-filled center at the point where your in-breath fuses with your out-breath.  As you exhale and your breath is out completely, visualize a universal pause in which your particular self vanishes and focus on your interconnectedness with everything around you.
Summary:
Prepare yourself and your space for meditation Stretch your body. Sit in a comfortable position. Establish your breathing.