Summarize the following:
If you were the one who ended the relationship, or if you said hurtful things to your ex, you need to explicitly apologize. Don’t try to skirt around the issues that lead to your breakup. Own up to your mistakes and take responsibility for ways in which you may have wronged or offended your ex. On the other hand, you will also need to forgive your ex for any emotional harm they may have done you. If you reconnect with your ex but still harbor resentment or bitterness, the relationship is bound to fail again. While you and your ex will need to discuss and somehow resolve core issues that lead to your prior breakup, there’s no point in dragging one another through the emotionally painful details. Focus on good things about your ex, and express these in conversation. For example, say things like:   “I was out with friends the other night, and I started thinking about how funny you are and how much I love the way out senses of humor work together.” It may help to take some time to process any stressful events or painful details of the past. Over time, your negative emotions will lose their strength, and you can gain a healthier perspective on the contributions of you and your ex to your relationship’s end. An objective third party, such as a couples therapist, can help you and your ex increase your chances of a successful relationship going forward. A counselor can help you move past difficult issues and communicate more effectively. They can also provide support so you don’t fall back into the same old habits that led to the end of your old relationship. If your ex agrees to rekindle the relationship, start making new memories, going on new dates, and re-forging your emotional connection. It can be tempting to bring old relationship baggage with you when reconciling with an ex, but don’t give in. It can be helpful even to form a couple of new friendships that you and your partner both enjoy. This will help you both get over the breakup by interacting with more people socially.
Apologize for things you did wrong. Avoid re-hashing painful past details. Seek out couples counseling. Move forward, with your focus on the present.