People have a natural tendencies to see negative life events as a consequence of personal shortcomings. You think your coworker doesn't want to go out with you because of your character flaws. You think that journal rejected your short story because you're a bad writer. In reality, there are an infinite variety of factors that can affect any given situation.  Much of success is rooted in luck. There is only so much you can control about a given situation. Even if you do everything right, something can still go wrong. Blaming yourself limits your perspective. When you find yourself personalizing disappointment, remind yourself you do not know all the factors involved in a given situation. It can even be helpful to say or think to yourself, "I don't know. I don't know."  For example, say you're disappointed because your cousin backed out of coming to visit you at the last minute. Your first instinct may be to wonder if you did or said anything to upset her. However, your cousin works 2 jobs in a city 200 miles away, has a boyfriend, social life, and is involved in her community. There are many factors that could prevent her from making her trip. If she did not give you a explicit reason for not coming, you don't know why this event did not work out in your favor. Pause for a moment to consider all the other factors involved and remind yourself this disappointment is likely not personal. People often set internal rules for themselves. You may, for example, have a mental list of standards that must be met in order for you to feel fulfilled, happy, and successful. While it's a good idea to have a sense of what you want in life, sometimes circumstances are unfavorable and beyond your control. In the wake of disappointment, reassess the standards you hold yourself to and consider whether they're truly realistic.  What do you think you need in order to be happy? Do you need to have a job, a perfect social life, and a significant other all at once to feel fulfilled? In reality, it might not be possible to control all these factors. If you believe you need to live at a certain standard to feel happiness, you may react more harshly to disappointments.  People often set standards they cannot control as a measure of happiness and fulfillment. For example, you may see having a boyfriend or girlfriend as a measure of personal success. However, romance is very difficult to control. You can't force yourself to meet the right person.  Try to let go of some of your standards. Accept that life means you're often living less than ideal conditions. Try to create standards for personal happiness you can control. For example, something like, "I am happy when I'm trying my best." Take a look at your expectations in a given situation. You may have set unrealistic goals or standards for yourself or a given situation. This can easily lead to disappointment.  You may hold yourself to very high standards. You may expect to have your dream job by a certain age or have a healthy, active social life immediately after moving to a new city. You may also hold those around you to unreasonable expectations. You may feel your friends should never be late to a movie, even if it's only by a few minutes. You may think your significant other should always want to spend weekend nights with you, even if he or she has plans with friends. Pause and consider whether your expectations for a situation are really realistic.  Adjust expectations to cope with disappointment. Say you're disappointed because a friend was 5 minutes late to a movie due to traffic. Pause and see the situation more objectively. In reality, we cannot control other people's actions. If you want to have an active social life, people will occasionally be late. The next time you go see a movie, try to accept that lateness is a risk but it does not need to interfere with you having a good time. If you've had a particularly harsh disappointment, being optimistic may be challenging. However, it's important to strive for optimism in the aftermath of disappointment. This can help you acknowledge a setback is not the be all, end all and allow you to move forward.  Try to look for new opportunities the situation presented. You should also try to see the situation as a learning experience. What lessons can be gained from this experience? What can you do better next time?  Life is a process of growing, changing, and adapting based on your experiences. Disappointments, while frustrating, help you grow.  Remember, a bad moment does not mean a bad life. You can increase your chances of assuring things get better by learning from the negative. For example, say you get turned down from a job due to a lack of specific experience. You can take this as an opportunity to work on building your resume. Seek out volunteer work, freelance work, and start your own projects, like developing a blog related to your area of work. Maybe, in three months, you'll be offered a better, higher paying job. While missing out on the first job was a disappointment, you never would have made the effort to better yourself if that disappointment did not occur. Self-reflection is essential for your mental health. After experiencing disappointment, look at all that's happening around the event. How are you growing and changing based on this experience? What have you learned about yourself? Try looking past this single moment. Instead, see it as one in a series of events that's shaping you as a person. If you're struggling to see a big picture, consider talking to a therapist. A qualified therapist can help you sort out your emotions and evaluate things in a healthy, productive manner.

Summary: Do not take disappointment personally. Reframe your rules. Examine your expectations. Strive for optimism. Look at the big picture.


If you're not already, you need to be signed into your account. eBay needs to know who you are and your purchase history to offer you a return. You'll just need your username and password to sign in. If you haven't already, you need to find your order. Look for it under "My eBay" and "Purchase History." Your order should be listed under your recent purchases. If it's not, make sure you're signed into the right account, and not someone else's in the household. " Once you've found the item, look for the link that says "More Actions" over to the right. In the drop-down menu, you'll find "Return This Item." Click on it. Once you click on it, you'll be redirected to a return page. You can also click on the order to bring up a new page. On that page, you can find "Return Item" in the middle of the page. It should be under "Contact Seller." On the form page, you'll need to fill in some details about the item. First, you'll need to select a reason for the return from the drop-down list, such as "Changed my mind," "Doesn't fit," or "Wrong item." Then, you'll need to add details about why you want to return it. Finally you can add photos of the item to the form if you need to prove a point. Click "Request a Return" when you are done.

Summary: Sign into your eBay account. Find your order. Choose "Return This Item. Fill in the form.


If your oven does not have a Preheat feature that alerts you when it reaches temperature, check to see if it has a thermometer inside that will indicate when it’s hot enough. Otherwise, put the potatoes in whenever they’re ready -- they may just take a little longer to roast. When the potatoes are done, you’ll be able to push a fork into one without any resistance. The skins should also be slightly wrinkled and golden, and you should be able to smell them strongly. You can coarsely chop some fresh parsley or mint and add it to the potatoes after they cool for some extra flavor. You may also want to add a little extra olive oil if the potatoes seem dry.
Summary: Preheat the oven to 400 °F (204 °C). Bake the potatoes for another 20 minutes or until they’re soft. Put the potatoes in a serving dish and garnish them.