Q: The most important thing you can do for your new baby is to be there for them whenever they need you, any time of night or day.    You need to become 100% dependable in your child's eyes, by responding to them either verbally or physically whenever they cry or call out for you.  This is particularly important for older babies who have spent time in an orphanage or foster care. They may be accustomed to no one responding when they cry, so you need to earn their trust by showing them that you will always come when they need you. It is not a good idea to let adopted babies cry when they wake at night. They need to feel loved and secure, so go to them within 15 seconds to hug and comfort them, or keep them in your bedroom until they have fully adjusted to their new surroundings. You want your baby to take you for granted, to fully expect that you will come when they cry. This is how they will come to see you as their mother or father, and not just another caregiver. Beyond just being there for your baby when they need you, it is important that you shower the baby with affection and love, which can be achieved through physical contact.  Hold your baby as often as possible, rocking her, cuddling her, feeding her. Hold the baby in your arms whenever you can and never leave her unattended in a crib or baby seat for long periods of time. Make eye contact with the baby while you feed her or rock her in your arms - this will help to establish a bond between the two of you. Smile at the baby whenever she looks at you and talk to her in a soothing, loving voice. In time, she will come to associate these actions with safety and love, and will learn to respond in kind. If you are busy, place the baby in a sling and carry her against your chest so she can hear your heartbeat and become accustomed to your scent. A predictable daily routine will allow your baby to feel safe and secure, while helping to minimize the stress many newly-adopted babies experience when they find themselves in a new home.  Completing certain actions, such as bottle time, nap time, bath time and play time, at the same times each day can increase your baby's confidence and help her to feel safe. Try to narrate these activities as you do them. When she wakes up in the morning, tell her what the plan is for that day. Even if she can't understand the words, she will come to associate your voice with these nurturing, repetitive actions. To enable this to work properly, you will need to take several weeks once the baby arrives to just stay at home and establish the routine, without any distractions or disruptions. Keep things low-key - avoid bringing the baby around to different houses, to the shopping center or to the park, and limit the number of visitors you have at your house - at least for a few weeks. The baby needs to feel secure and home, which she will find impossible if her surroundings are constantly changing. Despite the need for routine, it is important to remain flexible within the familiar structure. Learn to respond to your child's cues - if you hear her hungry cry, then feed her; don't wait until the assigned feeding time. Keep in mind that forming a deep bond with your baby will take time. Yes, you may fall in love with them instantly, but that love will continue to grow and deepen over time.  Sometimes the baby will not respond to you in the way that you'd hoped. They may refuse to make eye contact, turn their head away from you when you speak to them, or else become very clingy and upset around you. If this happens, don't despair. Keep treating the child with love, patience and affection and they will eventually come around. Keep in mind that you have had months, perhaps even years, to prepare for welcoming this baby into your home. You probably loved her before you ever set eyes on her. But for the baby, everything was probably very sudden and she will need time to adjust to her new home and to accept you as her parent. Earning your adopted baby's love and trust will be one of the most rewarding experiences of your life.
A: Be reliable. Be physically present . Create a routine. Remember that attachment is a process.

Q: The easiest way to begin a conversation with someone you want to talk to is to ask a favor. You don’t know this person yet, so you don’t know what you have in common. Asking a favor is a neutral way to enter into conversation without boring them with something they don’t care about.  Make sure it’s a small favor that won’t put her out. For example, ask to borrow a pen or read their class notes to see something you missed. If you don’t have your textbook, ask to look on with her. That way, you can sit closer to her, too! Since you don’t know her very well yet, you might not know what she likes. The only thing you know for sure that you have in common is the class you’re in with her. Even if you understood the class lecture perfectly, ask her to clarify something the teacher said.  As opposed to asking a favor, which can result in a very quick interaction, asking someone to explain something to you will probably result in a longer conversation. Keep the conversation going by asking follow-up questions. If she didn’t understand either, show solidarity! Let her know that you’re in it together, and that you have something in common. Girls love guys with a sense of humor, so try to make her laugh. Make eye contact with her when somebody says something silly, or roll your eyes when the teacher assigns homework. Make sure you’re not disrupting class, though, or drawing the teacher’s attention. Getting in trouble will not impress her! You’re looking for anything that begins a speaking relationship with her, so make her feel like you want to know what she has to say. Ask her something related to class, like what she thinks is going to be on the next test, or how many hours she’s planning on putting into preparation for a presentation. Don’t talk over her when she gives her opinion. Let her talk for as long as she wants, and show interest in what she has to say. Giving compliments is a lot trickier than it sounds. You may think “who doesn’t like getting a compliment?” but you should always be respectful of girls when complimenting them. Always complimenting girls on how pretty they are sends the message that you only like them for their looks, and most girls don’t like to be made to feel that way. Compliment her on something she actually had to work for, rather than something she was born with. This might be related to her appearance or not.  Compliment her on her hairstyle on a particular day instead of her eyes. Compliment her on an outfit she put together. Tell her you liked her answer to a question in class. Congratulate her for doing well on a test if you see she got a good grade. Don't bother her with questions or favors if you see that she's concentrating on something or she's late and has to run to her next class. If you have a class with her, you're going to see her every day, so wait for a time when she seems relaxed and in a good mood to break the ice with her.
A:
Ask a small favor. Ask a question about something the teacher said. Make her laugh. Ask for her opinion on something related to class. Give her a compliment. Choose the right time for your icebreaker.