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Watch out for anyone who has abused you in the past. Look for violent behavior. Pay attention to jealousy and controlling behavior. Notice if the person tries to isolate you. Listen to how the person justifies abusive behavior. Consider how the person treats animals and children. Think about the person’s sexual behavior.
People who have abused you in the past are more likely to abuse you again. For this reason, you should avoid contact with anyone who has abused you in the past.  If avoiding contact with this person is not possible, then avoid spending time alone with the person. Ask a friend or family member to accompany you whenever you have to spend time around the abuser. Stay away from anyone who has threatened you with abuse. Threatened abuse is likely to lead to actual abuse at some point, so you should also avoid contact with anyone who has threatened you. People who display violent behavior are also more likely to become abusers. You may feel like you have to walk on eggshells around the person to avoid making him or her angry. Try to avoid having contact with people who display their anger in violent or forceful ways. Some examples of this type of behavior might include:  throwing things breaking items punching walls or kicking furniture grabbing your arm or physically restraining you in other ways People who seem to need to control everyone and everything are also more likely to be abusive. If your significant other is often jealous for no reason or wants to know every detail about where you have been or are going, then he or she may turn to abuse at some point. Some examples of jealousy and controlling behavior might include:  constantly checking up on you giving you the 3rd degree if you are late calling you a “liar” telling you how to dress or act pressuring you to make an immediate commitment Abusive people often use isolation as a way to control people. This may be subtle at first, such as requesting that you do not spend as much time with certain people. However, an abusive person may soon be forbidding you from seeing certain people, even if they are your close friends or family members. An abuser may accuse certain friends or family members of being “trouble makers” or “nosy.” In a heterosexual relationship with a male abuser, he may also accuse you of being a “whore” for spending time with male friends or of being a “lesbian” for spending time with female friends. Abusive people tend to find ways to excuse their behavior and they often blame other people, including those who they abuse. Think about what the person says after he or she has done something abusive.  Does the person tend to blame you or other people for his violent behavior? If so, then do what you can to get away from this person. It is likely that he or she is going to continue to justify violent behavior towards you. Some abusive people may also accuse those who they abuse of being "too sensitive." If someone often makes you feel bad about yourself, but then dismisses your feelings, then this person may be abusing you. Abusive people may be cruel to animals and children. Pay attention to how the person behaves around animals and children to get hints about how he or she might treat you. For example, does the person ever kick the dog out of frustration? Or has the person ever said something nasty to a child because he or she was in a bad mood? These behaviors can indicate that someone may become abusive towards you in the future. Some abusive people will engage in violent acts during consensual sex. For example, the person might try to restrain you during sex, hit you, or continue doing something even though you have expressed your dislike of it. Watch for these types of signs. Do not stay with someone who makes sex painful or uncomfortable for you.