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If everyone were just like everyone else, the world would be boring. Your quirks are part of what makes you memorable, and you don't need to censor yourself or try to look "normal." It is absolutely okay to be disabled and to look disabled in public. A good therapy will leave you better off than you were before, and you will gain skills to help you become more well-adjusted. You can also learn coping mechanisms, alternative methods of doing difficult tasks, and how to capitalize on your strengths.   Options include sensory integration therapy, talk therapy, occupational therapy, special diets, behavior therapy, and seeing a psychologist for emotional issues. Always check with a doctor before altering your diet or attempting an alternative treatment.  Be careful about behavior therapies. Some therapies are based on compliance and may hurt more than helping. If your therapist's goal is to make you more normal (rather than more comfortable or more competent), or if you feel upset and anxious about seeing them, then find a better therapist. that are too hard. With the media constantly encouraging people to "do your best," sometimes people forget that it's okay to quit. You do not have to put forth 110% effort all the time—this can lead to burnout. If something is draining your energy or adding a lot of stress to your life, stop doing it. Sometimes saying "I quit" is freeing.  Disability doesn't just mean that there are some things you can't do. It can also mean that some things are painful or extremely draining for you. Give yourself permission to quit or find an alternative way. This will help you spend less energy mourning your disability, and more energy on doing positive things and enjoying your life.   Spend time on your hobbies and things that you're good at. Enjoy the feeling of competence and expertise. Make a list of your positive traits. Consider both personality traits and skills. Place the list somewhere where it'll be easy to see when you're feeling sad about yourself. Help other people. Prepare food for the hungry, raise awareness for important causes, or write about your special interest on wikiHow. Effecting a positive change in the world will distract you, help others, and make you feel happier about yourself. Being disabled can be difficult, and it's important to treat yourself well. Cut out energy drains from your life so you can focus on what matters most to you.   Pushing yourself to meet non-autistic standards will only take a toll on your health. It is okay to ask for academic accommodations, take extra breaks, or quit doing things that are too stressful to achieve. Pay extra attention to general health advice: sleep for at least 8 hours, eat fruits and vegetables, limit junk food, minimize stress, and exercise regularly (taking walks counts). Self-care is extra important for you, to mitigate stress and help reduce meltdowns and shutdowns. If you have trouble with self-care, it's okay to ask for help. Assisted living, a group home, or living with family might be better for you. Talk with a doctor, social worker, or therapist if you're struggling. There's no shame in meeting your needs, and it'll free up time for things you love. Look for people in your life whose judgment you trust: parents, older siblings, relatives, counselors, clergy members, friends, etc. Living in a neurotypical world can be confusing, so it's useful to have people to ask for advice. You can ask questions from "Is this outfit good for an awards ceremony?" to "This person makes me feel awful; what do I do?" You have the right to ask for accommodations, stim in public, and do what you need to do in order to function. Toning down your behavior is your choice—not something to be pushed or coerced out of you. You are not required to act more neurotypical just because everyone else is used to it.  Try to stop masking when you can. Masking is linked to mental health risks. Try to be yourself more often. People can love you and your autism. You can love yourself and your autism. You are not a lesser person. Anxiety, depression, and self-esteem issues are unfortunately common in autistic people. Identify someone you trust and explain to them how awful you feel.   If you think you may have anxiety and/or depression, try to schedule a doctor's appointment. The doctor can give you a screening and perhaps some helpful medicine. You are not being selfish or burdensome by sharing negative feelings. People can probably tell if you are feeling awful; they just may not know how to help. If you tell them, this is helpful to them, because then they can know what to do and worry less.
Remember that it's okay to be different. Find therapies and treatments that work for you. Stop trying to do things Focus on your skills and character strengths. Practice self-care. Get a mentor (or two). Stop apologizing for being autistic. Recognize that autism is just one piece of who you are—a kind, thoughtful, and lovable human being. Talk to someone if you are overwhelmed by self hatred.