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To be sexy, you'll need to feel confident and relaxed. Feeling stressed, absent, or down on yourself can ruin your sexiness. Mindfulness is a practice of paying attention to your thoughts, senses, and feelings in the moment, without interpretation or judgement. To practice mindfulness, pay attention to your senses.  Ask yourself "what am I smelling, seeing, how am I moving, how does my body feel?"  Practice mindfulness by paying close attention when someone is talking to you. Try to take in every word they say.   Meditate on your breathing. Feel the breath coming in and out of you. Notice which parts of your body rise and fall. When your mind wanders, remind yourself to pay attention to your breath.   Study an everyday object. Spend some time each day looking at something you see all the time, such as your toothbrush. Try to notice new details.   Do a mindfulness exercise when you feel yourself becoming tense or negative. If an unwanted thought comes to you, gently acknowledge it. Then turn your attention to the things you are feeling and sensing. Good hygiene and good grooming will make you feel good and look good to others. Dress in clean clothes that you like. You don't have to spend a lot of time getting dressed: you can feel good in an outfit you wear all the time as long as you like the way you look in it. Shower after you have exercised or when you would like to feel fresh, and shampoo no more than three times a week.  You will feel sexier if you wear only clothing you really like. Go through your closet and get rid of anything you don't really wear, or wear only out of obligation. Wear clothing that feels good on your skin. For a sensual presentation, wear silks and soft cottons. Clothing that fits to your body but does not uncomfortably squeeze it will make you feel and look sexy. Not only can dance help you get fit, it can also boost your self-confidence and help prepare you for future dates. Find a type of dance that appeals to you, and you're all likely to find people who share your interests. If you're a lovable dork, sign up for a class of contra dancing. If you'd like to learn moves you can use when you're going out, take a hip-hop class. Look for listings at your local community center, or online. One of the most attractive qualities of a potential partner is emotional stability, Do your moods go up and down? Do you lose your friends frequently? Practicing mindfulness can be helpful, but so can visiting a therapist or counselor. To find the right kind of therapist, call a university psychology department and ask for recommendations, or ask your health care professional for advice. If you want someone to find you sexy, listen to them when they talk. Heterosexual men, in particular, are aroused by the experience of being attentively heard. If you make a general practice of listening attentively and responding without judgement, you may be widely perceived as being sexy. To feel sexy and stay fit, get a good night's sleep. Adults need 7-8 hours of sleep a night, with as few interruptions as possible. Sleep deprivation will interfere with your fitness, your immune resistance, your weight, and your mental health.
Practice mindfulness. Dress to impress yourself. Take a dance class. Pay attention to your feelings. Listen attentively to others. Get the sleep you need.