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Think about the situation. Determine what closure means to you. Write about how you feel. Talk to a professional.
There are lots of different reasons why you might want to get closure on something. For example, you might want closure regarding a breakup, something bad that happened to you as a child, or something that you did to someone else. Whatever the situation or your reasons for wanting to get closure, you will need to identify them to move forward.  Try to pinpoint the situation that you are seeking closure for and the reasons why you want to get closure. What person or experience are you holding on to and why?  For example, perhaps you were bullied when you were a child and it's still affecting your life and self-esteem. Or, perhaps you suffered the effects of domestic violence when you were growing up. Keep in mind that seeking closure for something traumatic that happened to you can be difficult without the help of a trained mental health professional. Consider seeking help from a counselor before you begin this process. Rather, plan a roadmap of the progress you hope to make. Now that you know how you feel about what happened, think about how you would like to feel. What would it help you to know? What do you want for yourself? For instance, closure might mean that you get your self-esteem back after a breakup, in which case you should plan to focus on yourself, let go of thoughts of your ex, have fun with friends, and eventually start dating again. Or, closure might mean that you stop replaying an incident from your childhood over in your head. Writing about what happened is a good way to understand it better and start working towards closure. Writing can also help you to clarify your feelings about what happened. However, keep in mind that writing about your feelings is often the most difficult part of getting closure, so you should do this in the safety of a trained therapist's office. Reflect on the situation for which you are seeking closure and write down as many details as you can. Try to write out exactly what happened, every detail you remember, and how each part of it made you feel. Not having closure can interfere with your work life and your daily routines, which is why some people hurry into closure. However, working towards closure can bring up lots of painful emotions. Make sure that you work with a professional as you try to get closure.  A therapist can help you by using cognitive behavioral therapy techniques or gestalt therapy techniques. These techniques should not be used without the guidance of a therapist. If you are experiencing feelings of depression, loss of interest in living, or suicidal thoughts, then contact your doctor right away.