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Someone with attachment disorder has undergone a great deal of emotional trauma, some of which may still be deeply buried in their psyche. The best thing you can do to support a partner with attachment disorder is to be there for them emotionally, even if you don’t always understand what they’re going through.  Encourage them to express themselves freely, ask questions when you don’t understand something they say, and validate their emotions. This will help your partner trust you. Say things like “I want to know how you are feeling right now?” or “You seem upset…Talk to me about that.” It takes clear communication to maintain a relationship with a person who has attachment disorder. You and your partner likely perceive some things in very different ways. Certain behaviors of theirs may be hurtful or upsetting to you, and vice versa. Talk with your partner and establish boundaries for which behaviors you’re comfortable with in your relationship and which you aren’t. Setting personal boundaries shouldn’t mean that you and your partner never work to grow beyond your current emotional state. To maintain a healthy relationship, the person with attachment disorder will have to face their issues and learn to trust others at some point. However, don’t try to force your partner into this – they must be ready and willing to work on the issue themselves. Being in a relationship with someone who has attachment disorder can be emotionally exhausting at times. To keep your stress levels low, take time for yourself regularly and work on maintaining your own health. Eating a balanced diet, exercising regularly, getting enough sleep, and staying away from drugs and alcohol can help keep your emotions on an even keel. Even if you don’t have attachment disorder yourself, therapy can help you understand your partner better, learn strategies for effective communication, and work through your own emotions about your relationship. If you attend couples therapy with your partner, a therapist can help you identify negative patterns in your behavior with each other and find ways to avoid repeating those patterns.
Be emotionally available. Set and respect personal boundaries. Support your own mental and physical health. Participate in individual or couples therapy.