Summarize the following:
Make yourself available to talk when your child expresses interest in doing so.   Offer to give your teen a ride and then use the time in the car to chat; sometimes sitting side-by-side can offer a more comfortable venue for conversation. Sometimes this will be easier than others, but put forth the effort to ask questions about activities and events.  Follow your child’s sports team or attend his performances.  Consider learning more about one of your child’s interests to provide some common ground.  If your daughter is a die-hard soccer fan, start following her favorite league yourself.  While you should continue to allow your child space to develop her interests without feeling smothered, one area of common ground can make everyday conversation much easier. Encourage your child to participate in stress-relieving activities such as sports, or relaxing with a funny movie. Teenagers need time to themselves to process the many changes they’re going through.  Encourage your child to write in a private journal. Step back and allow your child the space to figure out some things on his own.  You’ll demonstrate you believe he is capable of making appropriate choices and that you trust his judgment. Teenagers benefit from positive reinforcement -- and lots of it -- as they grapple with forming their own, independent identity.  Tell them when you are proud of them.  Praise positive behavior.  Even in the midst of a more heated discussion, using positive terminology can be really helpful (“I know your teacher’s really impressed with your performance in chemistry.  Let’s figure out how we can agree upon a schedule that allows you to continue acing those exams and enjoy some time with your friends, too.”)  Use descriptive praise.  Be specific: “I really loved the way you helped your little brother with his jump shot.  I could see his pride when he made that basket -- you did a great job of helping him feel like he could improve his technique.” Let your child know that you’re aware of, and value, her opinions. This tactic can be especially important in situations where your relationship with your teenager has become quite difficult.  Another trusted adult such as an aunt, uncle, or family friend can help support your child through this difficult period in your lives. Even in situations where your relationship is reasonably strong, a mentor can provide your child with important extra support. Your teenager may be acting unlovable.  Your teen may even be feeling that he or she is unlovable.  Your job as a parent is to love them no matter what.  Leave a note, give a hug, or speak words of love to your child every day.
Spend time with your teenager. Stay involved in your teen’s everyday life. Offer your child some time alone. Affirm your child. Seek a mentor for your child. Show your love.