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Toddlers move very quickly from one feeling to the next, so if one can distract them long enough for them to forget what they’re upset about, you’ll be set. This is called redirection. Of course, the goal is not to distract them so that they never learn, but rather to help them move on from one thing to the next without getting caught in an emotional loop. However, there are some situations where redirecting is less productive. If your child has done something really bad, a strong scolding may be better. For example, hitting or biting another child may require a scolding, while simply not wanting to share is certainly a good opportunity for redirection. Always explain that and why a toddler shouldn’t do something. When they do something wrong, they need to know that it’s wrong so that they don’t do it again. Don’t make a big production about explaining to them, as this can make it more difficult to redirect them. Just state it simply and help them move on. For example, if your child is arguing with their sibling about sharing a toy, say: “Oh, we don’t fight with our brothers. We have to share so that everyone gets a turn. You can play with that toy later. How about you and I go play with the bubbles instead?” If the tantrum is related to something that they think or feel, it may be possible to redirect the child by forcing them to think about something else. Manually guide their thought process by asking them questions and slowly move the questions away from what they were upset about, until eventually they forget what the original problem was.  For example, if you see your child hit their elbow and a meltdown is on the way, ask if they hurt their toe. Their foot. Their hand. Their belly. Move from body part to body part that you know is not hurt, forcing them to think about the “not in pain” sensations in other parts of their body. Similarly, you can shift your child's attention to a new activity if they're upset about not doing what they want. Introduce the activity you want them to do, while also demonstrating it to them. You can also get their attention and encourage critical thinking by asking them questions about the activity, such as "What do you think?" Another redirection method is to create empathy while moving the child away from an action. This is helpful as a life skill, as it will help them become more considerate of the consequences of their actions for others. The empathy they have does not, necessarily, have to be for a real, living creature either.  “Oh, don’t draw on the couch. That gets the couch dirty and the couch HATES to take a bath. You don’t want to take a bath, do you?” “Aww, why are you hitting the table. That hurts the table. You don’t like it when your brother hits you, so why would you hit the table? How about we find a pot for you to hit instead?” “Don’t pull the kitty’s tail, that gives him an owie. We pet the kitty gently, like this. Oh, see, the kitty loves being pet gently. Look at how happy he is. Aw, he’s so happy.” When you redirect a child, you need to always give them something else to do. This teaches them to find other things that make them happy, rather than learning to simply sit around being upset about things they can’t have or do. This can be tricky, as sometimes toddlers can be very stubborn, so you’ll just have to know what works best for your child.  Save some activities that your child really enjoys for when they need to be redirected. For example, playing with playdough or blowing bubbles. During times when you expect your child to get upset, bring their favorite toy or activity to distract them. For example, you could bring their favorite game along to a doctor's appointment. If they’re having a really hard time finding something else to do, try relocating the child so that they have an easier time. Take them out of the room where the thing they want is when you give them something else to do. This way they have fewer visual reminders of what they were focused on.
Know when to redirect. Explain when you can. Change their line of thinking. Create empathy. Provide alternatives. Relocate the child.